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ramblings of a young adult

At times I wish certain things should not happen. Or perhaps, happen another time. Just like yesterday.

Head to airport after work. Reach there, waiting for him to come out for dinner. While was on my way, I did call his shop countless time, I did SMS him, no repond. Till the time that someone pick up the call, telling me he's already out buying food.

And what a reply from him telling me that he forget that we suppose to meet up for dinner. Of course I was freaking angry and I just walk away. And I head home. Reach home at 7pm, slept at 8pm, all the way till this morning around 10am.

Head was freaking heavy, I guess is because of the rain I caught yesterday. Called him to wake him up, not much words exchange and just hang up, And I did make the effort of asking him wanna eat later on, words exchange began harsh on one another. In the end, right now, I'm staring into space. I'm hungry. Freaking hungry. Not taken any single food today.

One mintue was telling me that sunday full shift, next was telling me that having dinner with his brother. Seriously, I don't understand, and I told him that. He didnt even reply with the correct thing, and trying to piss me off. And he said those nasty things that make me real nasty..

And... I dont know what the fcuk is wrong. I'm so fucking PISS!

I'm afraid. Afraid of losing something thats so dear to me in my life. I wanna say goodbye, so that it wont be having so much aches to see those tearful goodbye.




I'm alright, I'm good. Just having some XYZ thinking. I don't know what's wrong. I only know I'm tired, wanna rest, but afraid of so much things.. I need a break.

Awards night on monday. MADNESS again. Drink, drank, drunk. I'm a real sobber then. Had too much of drinks, till Marcus was real pissed with me. Sent me home and then cold war began. But I'm glad that things are better right now.

Went to work after 5days of MC. Extract my last wisdom tooth last wednesday. Its a week now, and things doesn't seems so fine.. ( I guess have infection towards it.) Anyway, went back to work, I stress myself up alot. Whereby 5days of rest, I went back shop, BLANK.

I guess its all personal stress.

With "black, long face" head towards Alley Bar. Madness began. Start the ball rolling with beers, mixer, anything and everything. Mix and had so much fun. And the most funny thing is regarding the awards that we're getting. The Offical And Unoffical awards. And I got myself one.. HAHA.

And I'm surprise that, sometimes, or infact most things, there's always a turning point.. (: I'm glad that, we're begining to be back like before. PHOTOS!

RJ, Candy. Outside Wisma, before heading towards Alley Bar.


Wisma Team.


Candy & Sandy. Yes they are sisters.


Eddie. My regional.


Xiao Jing.


Steven.


Estee.


Van. She look real pretty that day!


My buddy! Jayden. Who they call Kongfu panda.


Daniel, the BOSS!


Ignatius!


Not forgetting you, Vivien. (:


Rabia, Candy.


The awesome 4. (:


Lastly, my multi-task award. LMAO.


I'm sorry, its out of place, cause I was wasted when snapping the photo. Haha!

It actually says,
Multi-talent award. (Smoke a lot, drink a lot, eat a lot)
"Cotton On would like to commend you on your natual talent. Some people smoke a lot, others drink a lot and some eat a lot. We are fortunate to have someone on our team that can do all 3. Nice One!

MADNESS. Seriously, I've not been so WASTED before. I PUKE! And that sucks. Really. Oh man.

Went to You Bar yesterday. Not bad, nice lady boss there. But seriously, its for adults, or perhaps, uncles and aunties. HAHA. Was with Jason and Ming Hui. 2jars, 1 and half martel. You Bar closed at 230am, head to Boat Quay for drinks again. Where else?

Double C. Drink another 2jars. And, game over Ebel. I puke, and thankful I didn't make any funny things out. Was very sobber, but still good enough to know what am I doing. Really insane.. Martel with tigers, over and over again. Drink my heart out.

And yeah, I promise no more next time..





Half way thru.


Gone case.


Its been ages since I've update the blog. For a moment, I just wanna blog. Wanna pour out things.



And for this moment, I realise I've not been attending service for like weeks? Or perhaps months? I've lost count on how many weeks that I've been missing service. And what's worst is that I miss out FOP(Festival Of Praise) AND I WONDER WHY!?

Right now, I don't know why, was looking at my friend in church profile, and thats when I realise cellgroup already expand, so many new faces, looking at cellgroup's blog, make me realise so much changes..

I miss God, I miss church, I miss my first love with God..


So much things.. So emo right now... I wanna weep..




I know, You will be here with me, to comfort me all night long..

Does this sound meaningful to you? Cause it is to me. (:





To love & lost is better than not having to love at all..

Ending a relationship is just like having the worst nightmare after having the best dream.

We cannot beg someone to stay if they want to leave and be with someone else. We have to admit that love doesn't give us the license to own a person. This is what love means...sacrifice.

Often times we say goodbye to the person we love without wanting to. Though that doesnt mean that we've stopped loving them or we've stopped to care. Sometimes goodbye is a painful way to say I love you.

Some people say the worst way to miss someone is when they are right next to you and you know you can't have them,
but it's worse when you thought you didn't want them anymore and then all of a sudden you realize you can't live without them.

Deep in my heart, I'm suffering, knowing that I've lost you. On the outside, I'm living, pretending that I've forgotten you.

A failing love is like desperately hanging on to something precious; not wanting to give up, but your hands feel the pain. And, when you finally let go, you're free from any pain, but your hands are empty.

How can I promise you forever when tomorrow is so far away from me? How can I dry your tears when I have a bleeding heart inside of me? How can I ever forget you when your name is etched so deep within me?

They say no matter how dark the night is, the sun always rises again. I say lost love makes one realize that no matter how bright the day is, the sun will always set again.

A heart breaking isn't always as loud as a bomb exploding. Sometimes it can be as quiet as a feather falling. And the most painful thing is, no one really hears it, except you..

Who do you run to when the only person who can make you stop crying, is exactly the one who is making you cry?

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